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All I Need Right Now

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Scully considers the gestation of aliens in humans, and how God could let it happen.



Summary: Scully considers the gestation of aliens in
humans, and how God could let it happen.

Rated: PG because aliens inside humans are icky.

Category: Missing Scene, Scully POV.

Spoilers: The X-Files Movie: Fight the Future, The
Beginning.

Archive: Gossamer, any other place
is fine, as long as you ask me first.

Feedback: Always warmly welcomed, constructive
criticism or niceties at: patfiler2016@outlook.com.



"I saw what that virus did. I saw it generate a new being...
An alien being getting nutrients from a human body."

Mulder told me that just after we left the OPR meeting.
He keeps telling me he saw this *thing* coming out of
my body as he grabbed hold of the umbilical cord. Just
the thought of anything that invasive having to be
removed orally sets me gagging, feeling as if I've
swallowed something so slippery and slimy it's unbearable
to think about it. So, I write about it in this Journal and feel
just as sick.

Yes, as I think of Gibson, his "junk D.N.A.", the "junk D.N.A."
that we all seem to posses, I wonder why his abilities to
sense the "creatures" is active. I wonder what could
possibly have occurred during conception, gestation,
even birth to give him this gift? Is it a gift? Or is it a
curse?

A young boy resorts to playing chess because it's a way
of tuning out the thoughts of others. I still can't believe I
can say this. Yet, the tests have proven beyond a shadow
of a doubt that this boy has incredible abilities of some sort.
The cards, the things the panel had for breakfast.

Gibson Praise tracked this... this thing to a nuclear power
plant.

He can't be alive now. Could this "creature" kill one who
possesses similar genetic traits? Could Gibson defend
himself against this vile thing with the claws? The claw
I saw Mulder pick up at that house was incredibly strong
and capable of tearing a man's gut open in order to be
"born".

If, by any stretch of the imagination I had been host to one
of these supposed extraterrestrials, how do I reconcile
myself to a belief that the God who created us also created
them?

I've had this inner war for years: Hard science versus the
teachings of the Church. Evolution versus Creation. Well, if
God did create them, is there any way He can help me
understand why I can't recall anything after I was stung in the
hallway at Mulder's apartment right through to the time I woke
up on that icy continent hacking and gagging?

Mulder says I was hacking and gagging after he plucked that
*thing* out through my mouth.

If I can't remember, then I will wonder for a long time. If I am
unwilling to remember, perhaps some day I will welcome the
opportunity to recall. Yet I feel I may not be ready for that until
I know and understand how and why my ever loving God could
create such evil men to use innocent people as hosts for the
deadly *aliens* Mulder has tried to make me see, if only in my
mind's eye.

As long as I have nothing I can hold in a flask, a petrie dish or
my hand, there are no X-Files. All that we have left is our
partnership and our friendship. That's all I need right now. I don't
need to know how it felt to have been invaded. As long as I can't
remember my first abduction, I feel I just can't let myself
remember the last one.

Is it that I cannot remember? Or is it that I do not want to
remember?

All I really need right now is my friend, my partner, my work.
Perhaps it's this Journal that helps me to stay in the here
and now.



END

Disclaimer:  Mulder, Scully, and the whole cast are owned by
Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen Productions, and Fox Television.
No money changes hands to ME, anyway, and I do not intend
to break any copyright laws.