Pattie's Pocketful of X-Fics

I'm Not Surprised By Much Anymore

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Rated: PG

Category: AU, Non-Canon Character

Spoilers: None that I know of.

Summary: Mulder finds out he'd not the eldest in his family.


Archive: Gossamer, Nursery Files. Anybody else please ask.

Disclaimers: Mulder, Scully, William, Bill Mulder and Tina
Mulder and the show are owned by Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen
Productions and Fox Studios. The rest of the youngsters are
mine, and Mulder's newly found relative (it's a surprise as well).
(Fertile imagination, no pun intended... ) "Popular Mechanics"
is currently owned by Hearst Publications. "Solidarity Forever"
is a Pete Seeger song. "The Twilight Zone" was hosted by
Rod Serling. Okay, on with the story.

See Author's Note at end.

AUGUST 28, 2017
9:15 AM

The White House was in total chaos, with the president having lost
much Republican respect, many congressmen had either been fired
or quit. Mulder, Scully and Jeffery Spender had returned from vacation
at Quonoquotaugh, Rhode Island waiting for orders from Homeland

All three agents were also wondering about the possibility of being
assigned to mainstream cases such as interstate fraud, crime or
scams. Naturally, although the Gunmen were deceased, Mulder
was still buying tabloids, going through emails for tips on his
interests in the paranormal.

"Aren't you glad you finally joined us at the cottage?"

Jeffrey smiled. "Yes, Dana. I admit I needed the vacation.
Mulder, aren't you glad you are finally over those 'bad old

"You bet. I have to wonder if Samantha would have wanted
to go back there."

"We were raised together for a while, remember? She may
have needed some therapy. She's happy she escaped and
likely sought help. By the way, she called before I went out to
Rhode Island, work at the pharmacy is good, and she's still
selling paintings."

"And you didn't tell me."

"I meant to, but I was enjoying the company of my family,
wondering about our next assignement. I'm sorry. It
slipped my mind."

"Coffee?" Scully offered. That was her way of preventing
a possible argument and it worked. *I can play
psychologist as well as my husband,* she was thinking.

Both half-siblings replied in unison, "Yes."

As coffee was being poured, the phone rang.

Mulder jumped at the chance to answer. "I hope it's a
case. We're all bored. Mulder."

"Fox William Mulder?" a male voice inquired.

"Yes. Are you sure you have the right department?"

"Positive. Are you busy?"

"I'm having coffee with my colleagues. What can I do
for you?" Mulder didn't recognize the voice, so he was
hoping it was a tip."

"My name is Adam Lewis, age 57, and an adoptee. I
need to speak with you in private."

"I see. Hang on. Somebody wants to talk to me

Scully gave him 'the look'. "Mulder... "

"It's likely not a crop circle, sighting, or shapeshifter,
Scully. Sorry, Sir. How about Denny's on Benning Road?"

"Sure. I'm at work right now. Tonight at seven good for

"Better make it eight. I have a family."

"Sure. Should go. My boss is staring daggers at me."

Mulder hung up the phone. A Mr. Lewis wants to talk to
me and a word to both of you: Don't follow me. Deal?"

Jeffrey nodded.

"Okay," Scully replied. "I'll be too busy with the children,
William has a night class, and Greta and Susan are
both busy. Alison is in Texas; Mandy is working late. I hope
this is just an old friend or somebody asking about an
everyday occurance."

"I'll tell you after I see him, when I get home. We have no
secrets, you know that."

"Yes. Let's just drink our coffee and go through the day
as usual." She sensed something unusual, but what?

7:35 PM

If it wasn't breaking up the usual spat between Meg and
Samantha Ann, it was finnding casual attire since the laundry
was backlogged, but Mulder finally bade his family adieu,
kissing the three youngest and Scully. "I won't be long. Be
good for your Mom."

Meg, ever inquisitive, asked, "Where you going, Daddy?"

"Meeting an old friend, Honey." *No harm in a little white lie*,
he figured. Not even Scully would know until he returned.

7:55 PM

Mulder entered the diner and he saw a very familiar face
although he had never met the man. *Hazel eyes, light brown
hair greying*, he thought. He carefully approached the older

"Mr. Lewis?"

"Yes. I haven't eaten. So I know this is bad manners."

"That's okay. I have. I'll just order a coffee. So, they say
everybody has a look-alike, but this... this is unbelievable."

"I've been searching several years, and your name came
up, Agent Mulder."

Mulder signalled the server. "Coffee, double cream, please."

"Coming up, Sir. Anything else?"

"No. Just coffee, please."

As the server walked away, Mulder began his inquiry. "So,
are we in any way related?"

"Does the name Tina ring a bell?" The man was feasting
on turkey and mashed potatoes.

"Yes. My mother, and when she was married she cheated on
my father in their wedded unbliss, and I have a half-brother.

"Could be you have an older half-brother in me, but I'm not
sure. By the way, I am an electrician."

Mulder's coffee arrived. "Thanks. So, I am married to a doctor.
If 'once a cheater always a cheater' is true, would you mind if
we do some more investigating?"

"Not at all. You look a heck of a lot like me."

"I know. By the way, I married my FBI partner, and we have
been to hell and back with a very long story and a huge family."

"Lucky you. I thought I was alone. How's our mother?" The
poor man needed to know.

"Deceased. She was dying, and, well, I'll tell you after the
testing's been done."

"Anything I could inherit?" Now the guy was losing his appetite.

"No, except maybe nearsightedness or color blindness. Don't
worry. Just keep eating. She didn't want me in pain, so she... "

"Didn't tell you, or committed suicide?"

"Unfortunately, suicide." Mulder had to be honest.

"Oh no. I was hoping to meet my biological mother. Sorry."

"That makes two of us. Once I finish my coffee, I need to go
home. You could either give me your number or call me at
the office, and here's my home number."

"Tomorrow morning at coffee break. My boss is rather strict,"
Adam admitted. By the way, I am wearing contact lenses but
I am not color blind." He handed Mulder his number.

"Tell me about it. Anyhow, I'd better pay my bill and go home.
Work tomorrow."

"It was nice meeting you. I'm out of here, too."

9:05 PM

The three youngest were in bed, William and Mandy had
just arrived home, and Scully was setting out tea and

"Hey, Dad. What's up?"

"Not much. Just had coffee with an old friend. You?"

"Physics homework and lots of it."

Scully was still suspicious. *Old friend my a&%* she
thought. "Snack?"

"Sure. We need to talk, Dear."

Mandy herself was wondering. "About what? Are we going
to war?"

"No, Mandy. I can't say much right now."

William finished his snack and turned around as he went up
the stairwell, then continued on.

"It's okay. I need to chill with my music before bed," Mandy

Mulder hugged her. "'Night. Don't worry. I may have some
good news."

"Seeing is believing." She walked to her room muttering
*do I really want to know about another Alison? Nope.*

When the coast was clear, it was time to talk.

"Scully. I need a favor from one of your colleagues."

"Now what?" Was this going to be one of his outlandish
ideas? There was enough to deal with since a couple of
strong hurricanes were ready to hit the Caribbean, possibly
Florida, and two more possibly brewing in the Atlantic
Ocean. Both husband and wife were waiting to hear from
Homeland Security as well. *Have to wonder if it's the
onset of Armageddon*, Scully was thinking. Scully was
quickly taken out that reverie.

"Mr. Adam Lewis was adopted out a few years before
I was born, even before my parents were married. He
has been searching for years, and my mother's name
turned up as it was not a closed adoption."

"Are you sure this is not some scheme? Something like
a money grab?" Dana Katherine Scully, garden variety

"Positive. He has hazel eyes, light brown greying hair,
and even mentioned my mother by name. Not another

"Okay. I can get hold of a former colleague who owes
me a favor, and arrange for genetic testing, but are you
really sure?"

"Would I lie to you?" Puppy eyes.

"Not lately. Another family member. With a brother like
you, Samantha would be thrilled!" The woman was

"Um, I find it rather doubtful he'd tease her at this stage
in his life."

"All right, tomorrow I'll contact Debbie Wright, you tell
Mr. Lewis to prepare for tissue samples and blood tests.
Is he working?"

"Yes. He is an electrician. He has all of my numbers and
intends to call me tomorrow. As for your brother Bill... "

Scully threw Mulder the 'look'. "You both promised to make

"Well, yes we did. And we are still working on it, aren't we?"

"Yes, you are, and I love you both very dearly. I'm going up
for a soak. Care to join me?"

"Oh, yes! I'll even do the dishes while you run the bath."

"That's my partner."

William shot down the stairs. "Forgot to walk Lucky. Got too
wrapped up in my studies."

"If he's made any mess... " his mother began.

"I'll clean it up, I promise, Mom."

"By the time you get back, we'll be in bed. I'm in the office
tomorrow besides other things."

"What other things?"

"Things like shopping and you do not need to know

"No, I don't. I'll grab the leash and get going. It had better not
rain like in the Caribbean."

"Wouldn't worry about it just yet. Get going, please?"

"Okay, okay! Sheesh!"

AUGUST 29, 2017
7:35 AM

Both entered the office, Starbuck's cups in hand.

"Maybe I'd better call Dr. Wright ahead of time," Scully

"Sure. I'd bet Adam Lewis is already at work. His coffee
break is likely around 10:00 and he has one of those
bosses from Hell."

Scully smirked. "Well, if he is related to you, and has the
same way of behaving, it's a distinct possibility... "

"Oh yeah?"

"Oh yeah."

Both turned on their respective computers as Jeffery
appeared. "Morning."

"Hey, Jeffery. No news yet as to any assignments. Would
you mind going for break in the Hoover yard around 10:00?"

"Sure. Why?"

"I have my reasons, and nothing out of the ordinary. Let's just
get rid of the undone files. The Thompson file wasn't checked
for errors."

Jeffery glanced at Scully quizically, saw a 'search me' shrug
and dug into one of the file cabinets.

8:00 AM

Scully decided to contact Dr. Debbie White, and told Mulder
and Jeffery Spender she needed something she had forgotten
in the car. She decided the best place would be the parking
garage. *Thank Heaven my cell phone's in my jacket*, she
thought. Once out of earshot, she dialed Georgtown Hospital.
"Hello. This is Dr. Dana Scully Mulder. Is Dr. Wright available
at the moment?"

The receptionist replied, "Yes. She just came out of the surgical
theater, and is here handing in paper work. Dr. Wright, a Dr. Scully
Mulder would like to speak with you."

The woman's face lit up. "Dana, what's up? It's been a long time."

"Do have time to run some DNA testing for Mulder?"

"Of course, but I'm not doing genetics these days. Day surgery. I
owe you. My schedule says sometime around 2:00. Is this some

"Not exactly. Mulder was contacted by a possible relative."

"He's full of surprises. Male or female, Dana?"

"Male, age 58, and, from what I have been told, there is a
resemblance. He's a working man so he does have coverage."

"Good. They're more than welcome. I'll tell the lab. Dean Krill
is a pro. It may take a while, but he owes me from one of your
last cases."

"I remember him. I'm needed back at the office. We'll be in
contact soon. I promise. Lunch or you can meet our family."

"I'm glad you found your soulmate and settled down. We've got
so much to catch up on. Other line. Need to let you go."

"Take care. Give my regards to Dean." Click.

She practically flew into the office. "Mulder. Two men at the
Georgetown General. Around 2:00 today."

"Yes, Commodore."

"What's going on?" Jeffery asked.

"It's a family matter. When we find out for sure, you will know.
It could blow your mind." Mulder was glowing.

"The missus is expecting again?"

Scully laughed. "No, no. I have my hands full already. Like
Mulder said, you'll find out soon enough. I'm still trying to
wrap my head around this."

Jeffery nodded and grinned. "Your wife really is the skeptic,

"Let's just get on with the day, shall we. I still hate hospitals."

"You need a coffee, and the Thompson file was checked for
grammar, spelling and details. I'll pour. You two sit down."

9:55 AM

"Oh rats! Pen ran out of ink", Mulder grumbled. "Better run up
to supplies. Why not enjoy your coffee in the fresh air?"

"You can have one of my pens," Jeffery offered. "Your coffee
will be waiting if you're running upstairs."

"Oh, that's okay. No sense sitting down too much."

His half-brother was wondering what the mystery was.

Mulder decided the garage would be best. Once outside, he
pulled out his cell and dialed out Adam Lewis' cell number.

"Lewis. Whoever this is you're in luck. Break time and Mr.
Nasty isn't around." His colleagues chuckled in the back-

"Fox Mulder. Make up a good excuse such as an emergency or
an appointment for 2:00 today. We can do the testing at
Georgetown General."

"Sure. The boss would likely be happy to see me out of sight
anyway. See you then."

"I don't think it will take long. Take care." After he turned the
phone off, he decided to go to Supplies and grab a few pens to
make the excuse seem legitimate to Jeffery.

As he sipped on his chilling coffee and munched on sunflower
seeds, he began to wonder why this man was working as a
tradesman and had not gone to university. He seemed to have
the intellect. He was so deep in thought, Scully and Jeffery
startled him upon their return.

"Hey, there are decaffeinated brands out there," Scully

"Yeah, but I love fresh brewed. I was just making a mental list
of things to do, like getting a new battery for the van, paying
Fred for the bet I lost at the game at the Y Saturday."

"Sure," Jeffery smiled. You're no Scottie Pippin."

"No, my husband is not," Scully agreed. "We're not making our
money by idle chit chat, so let's just read the world news,
shall we? Research time."

What both fellow agents did not know was that Kersh would be
calling Mulder after lunch for some reason and it would make for
a great excuse to have the DNA testing done. Only Scully
would really know, courtesy of a sticky note placed into her

1:15 PM

The office phone rang. "Mulder."

"Get going. I know, keep it under wraps."

"Right away, Sir. That was Kersh. He wants me to run a profile
on some street vendor downtown. It won't take long." He kissed
Scully and saw Jeffery frowning. "What?"

"Thought we were on stand-by for Homeland."

"I have my cell, so no problem I can see. You gonna miss me?"

Scully just grinned.

"Forget it, Mulder. You'll tell me when you're ready. I can see
there's something more than a profile mode."

"Oh? I don't think you're psychic. I'm out of here."

1:55 PM

As he knew the way to Genetics, Mulder pressed the elevator
button. *First Susan, then Greta now this man*, he thought.
*What next? I've been cloned? Scrap that.*

Once he reached the reception desk, he flashed his ID and his
health coverage card number was taken."Have a seat, Sir. The
doctor will be with you shortly. Dr. Dean Krill."

He could see Adam Lewis flipping through an old copy of
Popular Mechanics.

"Hey, Mr. Lewis! Don't you just love out of date waiting room

"At least they're not fashion or beauty mags. It's the nurses,
I'm sure."

"Yeah," Mulder grimmaced. "Mostly advertisments. Look,
there's nothing to be nervous about. Just a few oral skin swabs
and a couple of blood tests, and if the lab. isn't too busy maybe
a day or two. Say, why did you choose electronics?"

"My I.Q. tests said I was above average, but I wanted to follow in
my adoptive Dad's footsteps to honor him. He died twelve years
ago. It's never too late to go back and learn something else.
Maybe I could get a degree in chemistry, or anything in the
sciences. By the way, did you go to university?"

"Oxford, Psychology. I'm a Criminal Profiler. I think you should
go for whatever you want. Oh, we have a half-sister who's a
pharmacist and painter. Mom's side of the family." He still felt
disgusted by the thought that C.G.B. Spender had fathered him.

Dr. Krill arrived, took one look at the pair, and smiled. "The lab
technician will be with you in a minute. What a resemblance!"

"Yes," Mulder admitted. "But we need to be sure. You must
be Dr. Krill. Special Agent Fox Mulder and Adam Lewis."

"You're Dana's husband." The doctor's pager beeped.
"Sheesh. I haven't slept in 72 hours. Probably a freaking

Mulder and Lewis laughed.

The technician appeared with two robes and escorted Mulder
and Lewis to the cubicles. "Wash your hands first, then just read
the labels on the tubes before you do the swabs and tighten the
lids. Nurse Giles will be drawing the blood."

"Been there, done that, got the tee shirt," Lewis quipped.

"That's my line, so we could quite well be related, and by law, if
that's the case, since I sold my mother's house in Greenwich
Connecticutt, though she had no will, I should by rights share
with you."

"Maybe. That's up to you, but my adoptive parents left me
enough. If we are half-brothers, I learned we may have 25%
of the same genes."

The nurse arrived, and said, "Okay. Just relax, take a deep
breath, and unlike some of my colleagues, I don't leave

"How long before the results are back?" Mulder asked.

"Two or three days depending on the techs and the lab."

After the blood was drawn and the swabs were sent out,
the two men had to return to work. Mulder offered his
possible relative a coffee, but it was turned down.

9:15 AM

Since it was Labor Day, Mulder Scully, Jeffery,
William, Susan, Greta, Mandy, and the three
youngest children were haggling over things to
do. Most stores were closed except for a few
corner stores and coffee shops. There were parks,
festivals in the city, concerts to go to and more.

The test results had not returned, and Mulder and
Scully had to keep tight-lipped for the family's sake.

Mandy was still hell bent on joining her friends to protest
the current Chief of State, and her newest picket sign
was in the livingroom for all to see. "I'm going to the
White House and NOT for a tour."

"No, this is a family day, and I will not be bailing you out,
and neither will your step father," Scully told her sternly.

"Did anybody here vote for him! No!!! Do we like what he's
doing? No! Do we... "

"Knock it off!" William yelled. "He'll be impeached any day

James was going to run to the powder room since he
disliked shouting, but Scully stood in his way. "James,
don't worry," she whispered, "I'll put on your favorite
'Scooby Doo' video, okay?"

James smiled. "Yes, Mommy. I think it would be great
to go to the splashpad today."

"There's an idea, the best one anybody brought up today."
She put the DVD on and James was happy.

"We could go to the Labor Day Parade," Mulder

"Great idea," Greta admitted. "My union friends want me
there. Well, maybe not. I'll stick around to help out."

"It would be great to have you," Scully responded. "I'll put
the kettle on."

Jeffery was just taking it all in, sipping his coffee and still
wondering what was going on with Mulder.

"I'd better walk Lucky," William said.

"I'll go with you," Jeffery offered.

"Deal, Uncle Jeffery. The others can decide what to do."

After the two men and Lucky left the house, the phone rang.

"Scully. Hang on. Mulder, it's for you. Dr. Krill."

"Mulder. I see. I can be there. Did you call him? I understand.
Take care."

"Results back?" Scully inquired.


"Another case?" Greta asked.

"Something like that. Love you all. It won't take long. Make
any decision you'd like. Meg, Samantha Ann, be good for
your Mom."


Adam Lewis was already waiting when Mulder appeared
at the Genetics Department, this time wearing his glasses
and drinking a coffee.

"Hey, Mulder!"

"Hey yourself, Adam. Soaking the contacts?"

"You bet. You?"

"I have several pairs," Mulder replied. "Where's the

"Lunch. He'll be back soon. I have to show up at the
Union Hall, and I have no use for them at all. The dues
are ridiculously high."

"I know. 'Solidarity Forever' like heck. I think I know
the results already."

"Me too. Wait until you meet the family. They're hard
to deal with at times, but the youngest have a mother
who was born into a Navy family, so we set the rules,
NOT the system."

"Good. I've read the news, and the abuse to kids in
Foster Care is terrible. It's broke. It needs to be fixed,"
Lewis stated.

"Hey guys!" Doctor Krill appeared, papers in hand.

"Good news or bad?" Mulder asked.

"Good. You are half-brothers maternally, sharing 25%
of genetic material. By the way, I researched your
mother. No chance of inheriting her disease. Gotta go,
being on call is a pain on a statutory holiday, but at
least I'm busy. Enjoy the day."

"That's great news. Now I know that I have a brother,
where do I go from here?" Lewis wondered aloud.

"Well, there is so much to catch up on," Mulder replied.
"You'll be meeting a lot of people, and some of our
people, especially from my wife's part of the family are...
well, did you ever see "The Twilight Zone?"

"Yes." By this time the man was in complete confusion.

"Just go to the Union Hall and enjoy, then tonight you will
be meeting the whole family, except for the wife's brothers.
Navy duty, like their father. He passed away several years
ago from a heart attack, Charlie Scully's okay, but Bill,
couldn't ask for a worse brother-in-law. The guy's tough
to deal with."

"Let's get out of here. Coffee?"

"You bet, but not here. I know a place where my sister-in-law
works where the service is better. After that, I'm dealing with
the family, still deciding on what to do today."

"Okay. To heck with my union. I'd rather be with the
family, and it should be interesting."

"Let's just get out of here, brother."

12:00 PM

As the men approached the house, Mulder told his
half-brother he would be meeting many children,
Scully's niece and her sister.

"Oh, boy. How the heck did that happen?" Lewis asked.

"Long, story," Mulder moaned, as he opened the door.
"Maybe after the youngest are in bed. They must have
decided on something to do for the day by now."

Adam Lewis gasped at all the red-heads in his view,
William and James the spitting images of his newly
found half-brother.

Scully was the first to greet him. "Well, so it's true! Hope
you're ready to eat. I'm Dana Scully Mulder. Better have a
swimsuit. We voted for the splash pad."

Mandy laughed. "Dad's going to put on that old Speedo?
Oh my God, I think I'm going to be stricken blind!"

END (Maybe)

Author's Note: Someone should write a fic about Mulder
having an older sibling (male or female) due to the fact that
either of his parents (Bill or Tina) had had a child before
marrying each other.

To be sent to The Nursery Files, "Somebody Should Write a
Story About" Section, once somebody gets my imperfect
Wi-Fi service up and running. (Sniff.)

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