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LI'L ALE' I INN
ROSWELL, NEW MEXICO
SCULLY, SITTING OUTSIDE ON MOTEL ROOM STOOP
As I write a new journal, I know this is a new chapter in our lives.
Now that we are not active F.B.I Agents, our relationship is sexual
with free abandon, and the fear of interdepartmental memos, rampant
rumours and silly hallway smirking is behind us.
But as I watched Mulder flick the clicker and complain there was
nothing to watch, even with 45 channels, I knew he was only bored.
He's a man who needs to be doing something purposeful every waking
hour or he will wither as some flowers do before me in the hot,
noon hour sun. The search for the truth was his sustenance, jogging
released his frustration, and the basketball kept his mind off of all
his burdens, even if only for brief hours of sweat and competition.
I know he is thinking, asking himself: "What next?", "Are They
Watching?", "Are We Being Hunted Down?" If he can protect us and for
how long. He's going over some of the pain he felt away from William
and me. And I'm sure he's thinking about William and what to do to
change his situation. Can he keep him safe? "What about Scully and
any children we might have, now knowing she's fertile?" That's a
desire he knows I have. Very deeply. I cherish family and a future
permanent home very much.
Monica Reyes packed a cell phone for me -- new number, pre-
programmed with only the numbers whereby we can reach her, or John
Doggett. The attached letter advising me to wait for them to call first for the
time being only makes me fear Mulder, in his cell phone withdrawal may
reach the damn thing before I do and perhaps become careless. I don't
know. Maybe he has one, too. He still hasn't taken anything out of
the backpack. Hasn't even really unpacked except to reach for a clean
shirt, underwear, pants and socks.
He won't want to stay put for long. Just as my Dad was always setting
sail, Ahab Mulder wants to get out of here. Even if it's fun making
love here, in the warm, romantic days here, (scaring the housekeeping
lady in his nakedness yesterday), I know we have to leave... and soon.
Our lives depend on it.
MULDER AND SCULLY'S MOTEL ROOM
DINING SET
What hour, what day, I have no idea. I know we can't sit around here
forever,hoping no one knows us, recognizes us, or comes for us. After
making love to my much beloved, supportive Scully, I listen in the dark,
quiet hours for any evil that may be waiting to apprehend us. To be
torn away from her would be every nightmare and torture I've ever
imagined and I'd hate myself for letting her be abandoned by me again.
To have her torn away would be skinning me alive, eating my soul with
every breath and heartbeat I take. I can't live without Scully. I
couldn't live not knowing some day William will be with us again.
After so long fighting my inner demons, I am ready to give her a
family and a home. We have to fight for that, fight the future and
our circumstances.
I need some exercise. The ruminating I have about the prison, my
abduction, even the worry for just today is giving me tension
headaches. A good run always took those away before. If I go
running, I might happen along the wrong person, maybe an alien or super
soldier posing as an old aquaintance. Who knows if they're out there
right now. They may have forgotten about us, but I doubt it.
Reyes and Doggett packed me a new cell phone with blocking features
and numbers to summon them for any reason, day or night. I must
resist the urge to call before they do, at first. To wait for a call
before we decide where we go may be stupid, too.
I want for Scully a hot bubble bath in a big tub, her favourite books
and journals, her mother, a place to sleep where no housekeeping
comes in to change the sheets because that place is home. Our home.
So much to plan if there's a bounty on our heads, or an angel
protecting us from harm. The new truth may be hell or heaven as far
as the former Agents Mulder and Scully are concerned. The other new
truth is that I love her with all my heart and always have. Same has
always been for her.
I wish I had access to a computer and some key sites. Since the Lone
Gunmen are dead, I guess I'm left to my own devices. Or am I? Maybe
Gibson Praise, who those bastards likely won't want to mess with,
because he has more powers than they know of, maybe he can help me
win this game for this season, for Scully and William.
It may just be time to set sail again. And I have a lot of files
stored in Dad's yard behind the house even SCULLY doesn't know about.
Including some knowledge of how the Consortium my Dad was with
contacted aliens from the resistance. The name Jeremiah Smith comes to
mind.
Yes, Starbuck, asea we must go. We have a whale to hunt and this is a
strong, stubborn, almost impossible one to stop. Almost. Together,
matey, we are formidable. We will win. I promise.
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