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Truths and Lies

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Mulder reflects on deals, lies, betrayals -- all the things the Cigarette Smoking Man specializes in -- as Scully is recovering from her fight with cancer.

Title: Truths and Lies

Author: Pattie

Rated: PG-13

Category: Angst, Mulder POV, Post-Ep.

Spoiler: Redux II

Feedback: I value your opinions at:
patfiler2016@outlook.com

Archive: Gossamer. My site. Anyone else please ask
as I am usually generous. I read others' fics too.

Discalimers: The characters are not mine. All are
owned by Chris Carter, 1013 Prodictions ans Fox
Studios. No copyright infringement intended.

The DOD. Department of Defence or Department of
Dumbing Down? I really can't tell anymore. All the things
I saw there, along with Scully's insistence that the samples I
retrieved from what I was told was a wild goose chase
confirmed that so many things were lies. More things than
most people can imagine. Some day, we will find a myriad
of truths to cut them down to size.

They had me where they wanted me, and hit me where it hurt
the most: The life of my partner, best friend, was in peril.
Major big time rare cancer that was supposed to all go away
if I had a doctor insert yet another chip into her body. I
declined the cigarette smoking son of a bitch's offer to give
me all I wanted in my sister's return, Scully's miracle cure
and a nice job with Mr. Cloak and Dagger.

Did he really believe I'd buy the young woman who said she
was Samantha (and I don't know that she was), Scully's cure
and a life happily ever after doing his dirty work? What was
he smoking besides tobacco?

The things I saw at the DOD made what I was told was a hoax a
truth. I'm not really sure I have all the truth. Kritchgau was
right after all.

As I write these very words, Scully is growing stronger every
day. The cancer has gone into remission and there's almost no
evidence it existed.

Everything I have seen in the past weeks has been one gigantic
sandbox that I had to sift through to determine fact from
fiction, loyalty from betrayal and life from death. Right now,
my mind is tired of playing 'Who's The Mole?'

But was there just one mole? Surely Blevins wasn't alone in
the charade. How could a Section Chief of the FBI be in so many
places at once? Surely he wasn't just the ringmaster. Scott
Ostelhoff, the voyeur and eavesdropper extraordinaire with all
his tapes and transcripts? And Cancerman. What role is he
playing in all this? Is he working for the DOD, some other bunch,
or as a lone wolf?

The woman he brought to me... I didn't grab her and run! I had
seen so many others who looked just like her. He was making it
too easy for me, and I knew that. She didn't exactly run into my
arms and beg me to take her to Mom and the house and everything
Samantha would hold dear to her heart. In a way, I was just so
close to actually grabbing her hand and running away with her,
straight to the FBI, the hospital, even my mother. Something
inside me wanted to do that so badly, I dreamt that letting her
go off with that dirty dealing S.O.B. was a mistake. Yet,
something else inside me told me she was another filthy lie. A
rental from 'Clones R Us'.

I needed to see Scully well. She needed to know the facts and
wouldn't disappoint me even if it killed her. The science she had
relied on so much, the sense that what I was looking for was so
close, and the desire to believe had her lying for me, studying
the sample I had brought back from The Yukon, and going around
almost dead. If she had died, it would have been my fault, I remember
telling myself, sometimes crying in the night for someone to just
send me all the answers to my questions, and for a cure for this
price she was paying because of my quest.

My decision was to get that damn cure for her. After seeing Father
McCue approaching her bedside, ready to give Scully the Last Rites,
I felt alone again, much as I felt before she claimed me as her FBI
partner. The prospect of losing such a close friend hurts just as
much as losing a family member.

So, with tears in my eyes one night, I sat by her bedside, held her
hand and cried bitter tears until I went home spent. Empty of hope.

I didn't know she had discovered so much about different DNA cells
in her body matching with some DNA from the sample I retrieved from
solid ice. There was so much information gleaned from her own blood
and the alien cells. A lot more than I could have imagined. She had
been carrying a virus since her abduction, and the removal of a chip
that men unknown to me had planted in her neck began the process of
her imminent demise.

But I was offered a somewhat unorthodox cure, and I went to grab it
much as an infant has a tight grip on one's little finger. It was
Scully's only hope, and I knew she would try for me even in an effort
to convince me she believed it would work, although maybe she didn't.
Somehow, her acceptance didn't comfort me. I was worried right up
until she started showing improvement.

Now,with all she has discovered these past few weeks, there's hope
I can find the truth about a lot of things. In our investigations,
we've encountered more mysteries than answers.

Her brother Bill's little lecture didn't offer me a lot of comfort,
either, but it did make me more determined to prove everyone else
wrong. Blevins was the mole, and Skinner said he had been working as
one for Roush Laboratories for some time. Just when you think you
know the players, you find out you weren't really following the
game. Now, Blevins is dead, and so is Cancerman. What the hell was
Cancerman doing with a picture of Samantha and me?

Why?

When I told Skinner about the offer of those who deceived us and
still do, she looked beautiful to me, despite all obvious appearances.
I'm pretty sure I looked reasonably good for someone who had supposedly
had his face shot to pieces, but I was very sure I had to tell her I
turned down their offer to protect me in exchange for naming Skinner
as the mole inside The Bureau. For some reason, I believe there's a
truth behind his oversight of Scully and me. He couldn't have been a
mole; I couldn't have betrayed him.

But I'm still not ready to yell, 'Yay! Skinner's on our side!!!' I
think both Scully and me want him to prove himself.

I AM ready to yell, "She's alive you evil bastards!"

We'll get to the bottom of all the lies together.



END

Disclaimer: Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen Productions own the rights
to The X-Files and all characters named in this story. No money
is earned through any of my fanfiction.