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Title: A Tale Of A Secret Smoker
Author: Pattie
Rated: PG-13
Summary: Mulder sniffs out the mystery of a person who
he thought had given up smoking years ago -- like during
adolescence.
Category: Vignette, SA, MA.
Spoilers/Timeframe: Everything up to Season 5.
Feedback: patfiler2016@outlook.com
Archive: Anywhere if you ask, but definitely Gossamer.
Disclaimer, I do not own Mulder, Scully and The X-Files.
Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and Fox Studios have
that honor. <sniff> To think I never make any money
writing these stories, but I love writing so much. It
keeps me from that nasty habit of mine.
Author's Note: Actor William B. Davis was once a smoker
in real life, quit, and acted as a spokesman for the
Canadian Cancer Society's campaign telling smokers
to kick the habit. As The Smoking Man on The X-Files,
he was smoking non-tobacco, herbal cigarettes such
as some made with clover. I know how hard it is to quit
as a smoker, and some day soon I'll find the strength
to do just that myself.
BTW, I hope I got all the mistakes out of this version!
Where was the smell of tobacco coming from? Mulder had
detected it at the front steps of Scully's apartment
building. Knowing she had arrived home not too long ago,
he suspected the worst: C.G.B. Spender must have been
lurking around, perhaps looking around in Scully's
apartment, or maybe he was actually IN her apartment?
He didn't want to take any chances that ***hole was
threatening her or something worse, so he pulled
out his service revolver and carefully made his way
to her apartment. When he knocked on the door with his
gun in full view, Scully was shocked.
"Uh, it's a felony to shoot an FBI Agent, so I suggest
you put that away, Mulder."
"Is he here?"
"Who?" Okay, maybe Spooky Partner was getting paranoid.
"The Smoking Man," Mulder replied cautiously and
quietly, as he began to look around the whole apartment.
"Mulder, are you all right?" *Gee, I wonder if he
stopped for a couple of drinks before coming here* she
thought. *Or maybe I've been too careless*.
"Uh, I'm trying to be over protective I guess. But I
did smell a cigarette just from outside of the building,"
Mulder told her, as he put away his gun.
"Probably one of the kids on the block," she replied.
How she hated to lie to Mulder, let alone her mother.
"So what brings you here not so long after we left the
office?"
"I brought the fax you left in the office. You said it
was important to the Mulligan case, and I guess since
you rushed out you forgot it. Here you go."
Scully breathed a sigh of relief, and tried to stay
away from the range of Mulder's olfactory senses.
"Thanks. I know we need the full report in ASAP, so
I wanted to read it over tonight and add a bit more to
my report so we could send it in."
Something was up. Mulder didn't know what. His partner
seemed rather jittery, a bit secretive. "What's the
matter, Scully? Are YOU all right?"
"Yes, Mulder. Mulder. Everything's fine. Thanks for the
fax. I'd better make something to eat and get to work.
You know how Skinner can be when we work too slowly for
his idea of promptness."
"Yeah. Well, I'm heading off to the Gunmen's for
some fajitas and poker. Don't stay up all night doing
what we should be doing at work. Good night."
"Good night, Mulder. I'll see you tomorrow. Or hear you
when you call me at 10:20 tonight." She fudged a smile.
"Hey, I don't call every night to ponder the mysteries
of the universe or ask about what normal erythrocyte
counts are in young men like me."
Scully gave him a 'get out of here' glare.
"All right. I'm gone. Lock the door after I leave."
"Oh, I always do, Mulder. I always do."
After he left she whispered to herself, "Damn that was
close," and entered the bedroom to change into
something comfortable and fresh.
As Mulder passed Scully's car, he could have sworn he
smelled cigarette smoke again, chalked it up to the
locals, and proceeded to his car. As he drove off,
Mulder chided himself for suspecting The Smoking Man had
been around, but he still had to wonder, in light of all
that had happened to them through his actions.
She just couldn't wait for that next nicotine fix, but
Scully managed to get through cooking and eating, and
opened the fax. After she read it, she put it on her
kitchen table, with some other files, then decided
they'd be better off on her computer desk so she could
get right to work -- after a mug of coffee outside and
a nice smoke break.
How it all started had been the stress of several events
that had happened to her, Mulder and many victims of
crime during the past few months, and she knew that.
She remembered that whenever she was 'mad at Mom', she
would sneak her mother's cigarettes and go out smoking.
She thought her teen years had been difficult, but not
really in comparison with a few of her school mates'
lives. Still, she wanted a drug-free fix, and wanted to
get back at her mother.
"Ah," she sighed, as she carried her coffee and a lit
cigarette outside for a little sit down and smoke on a
bench facing the street. It wasn't a great habit, and
she knew it. This had been going on for about three
weeks, and the desire to cough and throw up had long
left. *Got to pace myself. One at a time or I'll never get
much of anything done,* she told herself.
The next 'smoke break' would be just before bath time,
and she still kept to her regular schedule these nights,
even though the desire for still another cigarette
after the last evening's smoke had passed. *Better
freshen up the car before I go to bed, too*, she
reminded herself.
Scully was careful enough to smoke away from her
apartment. After all, her mother would occasionally
drop by, and then there was Mulder, sometimes showing
up for a beer or a beer and a movie. She was even
careful enough, or sneaky enough, to just write 'more'
on her shopping list, in case someone like Mulder
happened upon it.
The following morning, she was very careful about
pulling off a nice morning cigarette, showering, and
wearing a recently dry cleaned suit to work, because
she made short shrift of breakfast in order to get in
that very first cigarette of the day. Blender-style
breakfast, and she was off to the front of the building.
Once again, she sighed, "Ah," did what she craved to do,
then went about her pre-work routine.
Mulder was already at his desk when she arrived at
the Hoover Building, as usual. He was always at work
early. Scully placed her folders on Mulder's desk.
"Done," she said. Boy, was she ever feeling guilty.
"Great," Mulder replied. "Now we can get this
collated and upstairs. I can just add your report to
mine, and if we're lucky Skinner won't have another
case for us right away. Maybe we can get something
from The Gunmen, or an e-mail about UFO sightings or
a paranormal event."
"Yeah. We need a bit of a break, Mulder. Let's get
to work and then there'll be some time to take care
of the little things around here, go through the mail,
look for whatever spins your dials along the lines of
the supernatural, extraordinarily paranormal things."
"Gee, I never thought I'd hear that enthusiasm for the
monsters and aliens and freaky from you. This is a real
turn on! You're full of surprises."
"Yes, I am." She placed her purse beneath a work table
her computer sat upon, and started her computer. She
needed to think up an excuse, a plausible explanation
to get away from the building for a smoke. "Mulder, I
forgot to get a can of coffee for the office, so I can
go get us coffees down the street at coffee break."
"Well, I can do that. By the way, maybe you should lay
off of the coffee and go back to strictly tea. You've
been looking rather nervous lately."
"Okay, you're right. But I'll go for the coffee and
tea, Mulder. There are some new blends out there
Maybe they finally got the Earl Grey in stock." She
hoped it would work.
"All right. But it's still your turn to get the can
for tomorrow. May as well wait until we get out of
here later." He turned to his monitor and made some
entries to be printed out for the finished report.
"Yeah, I'll get it on my way home," she absent mindedly
said, as thoughts of ten o'clock entered her brain,
along with her renewed interest in smoking. *Pace
yourself*, she thought. *It could be so easy to smoke
even more. Then you're addicted.* She remembered
how difficult her mother had found quitting her habit.
Yet, oh for that next one! Her guess was she was
already addicted. Perhaps after she started forgetting
all the things they'd been through the past few months,
she could concentrate on quitting. Yes, no. She was
putting that off and she knew it in her heart. She was
violating her body. God's temple.
When ten o'clock rolled around, she picked up her
purse. "I shouldn't be long," she said.
"Okay, but don't talk to strangers," Mulder quipped.
"Well, then I wouldn't be able to order anything and
that would be a pity, wouldn't it?"
"Yeah, a world without coffee and tea."
Scully walked as quickly as she could to the nearest
exit and when she was sure she was far away enough away
from the Hoover Building, she grabbed the pack from her
purse and lit up. Of course it was a health risk. Of
course she was hiding something from Mulder. Of course
she was getting too used to this object. Of course
she was rebelling against her vow never to smoke again.
When she finally found the coffee shop, she went into
the ladies' room and grabbed a toothbrush and toothpaste
from her purse, then popped a breath mint to remove
the odor of cigarettes from her mouth. She hoped and
prayed it would work. The line-up for service wasn't
that long, so that was to her advantage.
As Scully walked back to the office, she was satisfied
that her craving had been satisfied, and couldn't wait
for lunch hour. One o'clock. She would have an errand to
run or some other reason not to eat with Mulder. Great
time for another cigarette.
"You wouldn't believe how smoke filled that place was,"
she intentionally told Mulder.
"Sure I would." Mulder sipped his coffee. "I can smell
it on you. So, did they have your Earl Grey?"
Scully put her cup on the desk, then her purse under
her table. "I had to settle for vanilla flavored. It's
quite refreshing, actually." She retrieved her tea and
went back to her table. She wasn't going to pull her
chair over to Mulder's desk for the usual coffee break
chat as she didn't want Mulder to suspect that the odor
of smoke was emanating from her. It was likely even in
her hair as well as her clothes and on her skin.
Mulder pondered the distance between them. They usually
took time out to talk 'non shop' at this time of day.
"Snob."
"No, Mulder. I'm not being a snob. I just want to go
through some e-mails, then get back to work."
"Oh. I didn't know you had so many friends to answer
that you couldn't enjoy our break with me." What the
heck was up with her? She'd been nervous lately,
secretive, running out of the office promptly at 5:30
and there was just this cigarette smell recurring too
often, and Scully seemed to be involved in it in some
way. As he sipped his coffee, he thought things over.
A theory. He had a theory, and he wanted to test it
out.
"Damn. I forgot my wallet, and I'll bet I left it in
my car. I filled up the gas tank before I signed in.
I'd better see if it's in there."
"Well, you never know who's lurking even in the Hoover
garage. I think you'd be wise to check it out," Scully
told him, but she was only half-heartedly thinking of
even him these days, as she pondered what she would do
at lunch time to get away from the building and have
that fix. She couldn't risk any Fibbie seeing her
smoking outside with the rest of the tobacco brigade.
The tobacco brigade would be talking about it, too, and
Mulder would find out somewhere in the hallways in a few
people talking about how surprised they were she had
joined them in a smoke break.
Mulder made his way to the garage, and as he had a spare
key to Scully's car as she had to his, he looked around
the car. No butts, no smell except that of honeysuckle,
which was not that unusual for her to use to keep her car
smelling fresh and clean. His theory didn't pan out. Now
HE had something to hide from his partner, and it wasn't
right. It wasn't right unless he had something or
someone to protect her from.
In the meantime, Scully was thinking of an alibi to eat
without Mulder and do her rebellious ritual. *Yes,*
she thought. *That would be believable.* She often had
a luncheon with a friend. Why not today? *But this is
beginning to take on a life of its own,* and she knew
she would have to quit some time.
Mulder was back and so was that smell, to him anyway.
His partner hadn't taken the risk of smoking in their
office. "I found it." He hated lying to Scully.
Partners don't have secrets.
"That's good, Mulder. Baldwin's car was broken into in
the garage just last week. So, are we ready to submit
that report?"
"Yes, finally. What a harrowing case. Let's go see 'The
Man'.
Once the pair had submitted their report for Skinner's
perusal, they returned to the office without an
assignemnt. Yet.Scully was relieved because then she
wouldn't have to sneak cigarettes, lie, constantly freshen up
and dig up excuses to be alone on the road.
Mulder had been thinking about all the incidents of that
smell of cigarette smoke. Although Scully tried her
damndest to hide it, it wasn't working. It hadn't worked
with her mother so many years ago, and it wasn't working
with Mulder. "Care to talk about it?"
Uh oh. "About what, partner?" She faked a smile. "No,
I'm not dating."
"What are you rebelling against this time?"
"The mice in my building. Why?"
"Well, I'm sure when you're ready to talk, you will. After
all, we trust each other, have eack other's backs, and I
can see something's bothering you."
"Mr. Psychologist and Special Agent Mulder, concentrate
on the cases and don't worry about me. I am fine."
"That's what you always say. 'I'm fine', when you're not.
Well, think about it, and you'll talk to me when you're
ready. Let's see if we can dig up some unsolved case to
revisit."
"I'd rather do that than sit around here doing nothing,
Mulder. Since we got the office repaired from the fire,
I do believe you have so much back up on your hard drive
with the many spooky cases, we can keep quite busy."
*He's getting suspicious,* she told herself. *Well, as
long as I can keep myself busy until lunch, I'll be
fine. I sure won't smoke in the ladies' room here.* "Oh,
did I tell you I'm meeting Tracy, my old college room mate
for lunch?"
"Maybe you mentioned it yesterday. We were really working
so hard. Thanks for reminding me." *Hmm, no lunch together
either in the office or at the nearby diner? That's not
the usual Dana Scully I know. I know there wasn't a word
about this meeting with her room mate.*
"Sorry, I thought I'd told you. Maybe it's time for
a vacation."
"Me? Take a vacation? No, not unless they force me to." He
decided he wasn't going to follow her out to wherever this
lunch date was because she occasionally did meet with old
friends or her mother for a change. Yet, he began to lose
even more sleep wondering about Scully. What was she
doing? He had not figured that out, but did not dare call
her in the middle of the night to accuse her of something
of which he had no concrete proof.
Saturday arrived, and it couldn't have happened too soon.
Scully had done her laundry the night before, her suits
were at the dry cleaner's, and she had arisen quite early
to clean the apartment, with her now traditional smoking
every couple of hours now.
Dressed casually, she grabbed a book, her cigarettes and
purse, and headed out the door for an afternoon in the
park with a nice, healthy lunch. She found a park bench
far from any view from the street, and indulged in her
new friend before even opening that paper bag filled with
more healthy things. The sad thing was, after that she
ate her lunch and lit up again. The book could wait.
No sooner had she done so, then who should be jogging in
the same park but Special Agent Fox Mulder. He didn't see
her yet, so she quickly stomped out the cigarette and
opened the book about one quarter of the way through.
It was then that Mulder saw her, and ran up to the bench.
"Hey."
"Hey yourself. What are you doing in Georgetown?"
"Well, I remembered this park was a great place to go
running, and there's a festival in my usual Alexandria
park. I was thinking of stopping off at your apartment
after my run, but you seem to be enjoying the sunshine
and fresh air for a change, so I see. What are you
reading?"
"1984. I was wondering if the things predicted in
that book have come true. So far we're not into
disposable paper clothing yet. One of my college
friends gave it to me for a birthday present. I
was laughing my head off."
Mulder remained quiet for about a half minute. "I
guess some smoker just passed you before I got
here."
"Cigarettes, again Mulder? Why are you going on
about them lately? What ever happened to 'I bought
a new molly' or 'You'll never guess what The Gunmen
added to their latest edition?'"
"What ever happened to the Scully who began smoking
so many years after having quit? Don't hang your
head. Look at me. What are you rebelling against
this time?"
She faced her partner with a sad look in her eyes and
kept silent. The shame showed, and so did her
intention to keep her mouth shut. She could really
use another cigarette at the moment.
"Come on, Scully. You can trust me. We're partners
as well as friends, at least that's what I prefer to
think. I've been suspecting this for a few days now,
and saw your little foot stomp out that thing."
"I don't know where to begin. Everything that's
happened to us in the past few months just seemed to
build up inside of me, I suppose. Maybe I'm trying
in my own way to exorcize all the demons that haunt
me in nightmares as a result of all the trauma we've
both been through. I didn't want to talk to anyone
about someof thethings that we've been through, and
I didn't want to remind you of what we've been through.
Karen the Social Worker wouldn't understand any of
the specifics, and so I must have had to find some
way of fighting the stress. The worst part is I
started lying to you. I know I broke your trust,
Mulder, and I'm sorry. You've been through enough, too
you know."
Mulder put his hand on her shoulder. "I can deal with
almost anything nowadays, because I've been at it longer
than you have. Do you think I didn't go through a lot
of trauma when Diana Fowley was working on the X-Files
with me? Yeah, I did. One day I decided to grow a
thicker skin, forget about every horrible thing I had
been going through, and decided to file them away in the
messy file cabinets you try so hard to sort out. I
think it would be a good idea to confide in me any time
you want to. For now, I suggest you envision those demons
and all the pain, put them into that cigarette pack, and
throw it away. Every bit of it. The next time you have
a craving, remember you threw all that stress into that
garbage bin over there. Do you think you can do that?
For me, Scully? And for yourself?"
She took a deep breath and tried her hardest to do what
Mulder was proposing. "I think so." She took the pack of
cigarettes, walked slowly to the nearest garbage bin, and
dropped it in with some slight hesitation. She was saying
good-bye to her new best friend who she knew was a traitor
of the worst kind. As she walked back to the bench, she
felt slightly better, yet there was lingering longing
and some anxiety. "Done."
"I'm proud of you, Scully. You can call me any time you're
tempted to start smoking again. Why don't I stick around a
while, we can walk around town, go to dinner, my treat,
and then I can walk back to my car after I take you home."
"Sounds good to me, Mulder, but I'll have to go home and
change, first. But I would like to walk around for a while
and talk more, I think. It's going to be a rough time for
many days, remembering not to smoke, but I did it before.
I can do it again."
Mulder smiled. "You're not mad anymore. You'll be
all right. We'll both be all right now."
As they both stood and started to tour the park, both felt
more relaxed and relieved. Both of them knew they weren't
alone anymore. Most importantly, Scully knew she already
had a best friend in Mulder.
END
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