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Title: Progressive Regression
Author: Pattie
Rated: PG
Category: Mulder Angst, MSR married, Post-Truth (We Won).
Spoilers: DeadAlive, Requiem. Post-Prevention of
Colonization.
Feedback: patfiler2016@outlook.com
Summary: Scully convinces Mulder to resolve his new inner
demons by undergoing regression therapy. Sequel to When You
Call for Me in Your Sleep.
Archive: Gossamer, any other nice home. Please let me visit.
Disclaimer: All characters, X-Files title and series, and
original premise and plots belong to Chris Carter, 1013
Productions and Fox Studios. Should I sue THEM for Seasons 8
and 9? Noooo, I'm WAY too NICE! So, I hope they are, as I
make no money and intend no copyright infringement.
Dana Scully-Mulder was a very tired mother these days.
William and Meg were quite the fighters, and the new baby
was being breastfed more frequently lately as she was
undergoing a growth spurt.
Sometimes a middle of the night feed was called for, but in
order to nurse a baby well, a mother needed her rest.
Sometimes there was an hour or two free for that in the
afternoons, with the little ones down for a nap. Not very
often, now. William was three and outgrowing the need for a
nap.
Fox Mulder was not sleeping well at all, lately. His wife
knew that his ordeal on the alien ship had traumatized him to
the point of nightmares long before they moved to Alexandria
so he could return to the X-Files Office. She had wanted him
to undergo regression therapy to confront the supressed
memories and pain of his abduction, but he adamantly refused
to do so. Positively, absolutely out of the question. Too
much to do at work. Why waste time in a futile effort to
recapture memories he wouldn't want to relive, even though
as a psychologist, he knew better than to take that stance.
Well, dammit, he was suffering Post Traumatic Stress and
Scully wanted him to deal with it, feel better, and help her
understand his pain. She took it upon herself to have Dr.
Werber meet her beloved right at the office along side her.
Grandma could babysit for a couple of hours or so for one,
two, ten, however many sessions it took to regain the
healthiest Mulder possible.
"Well, I don't really think this is the time or place for
such a thing, and as I have work to do... "
"So, when IS a good time?" Scully demanded. "You are in such
pain you don't get a good rest at night, you have me awake
twice as much as the baby does, and your screams, yes screams,
are terrifying the kids. You once said Dr. Werber could help
me, and he did. Now, we want to return the favor. My husband,
it would mean so much to me if I went through this with
you this time, right beside you. Please?"
"Well, I guess the anniversary haunting of an old historical
site can wait. Been a long time, Dr. Werber."
"You look good, considering all you've been through, Fox.
Shall we get started?"
Mulder nodded.
"All right. Get comfortable in that chair, and let every
muscle relax. Let go of all the tension in your body and mind.
Breathe deeply, slowly. Take yourself to a place you feel very
safe and secure. You may return there at any time during this
session to feel that way and seek refuge. We will keep you safe
as well. Now, what is the last thing you remember before
being taken?"
"Skinner and I were setting up a grid to expose an alien
ship. We didn't quite understand how it would operate, but we
had it working. I walked... I walked over to a place where ...
I was drawn into the presence of others who were taken from
Bellefleur. The grid wasn't visible, and Skinner... I
couldn't call out to him or see him. I was too focused on
the others. We were in some type of limbo or static state.
I think... I don't know... "
"Do you know what you did?"
"We were all held that way.. not moving or talking... just
aware of each other. Some were tested... probed... different
times, rooms. The... shapeshifters, bounty hunters, were
there... testing me... looked all alike... all the same
faces... needles, drills... strapped me down... pain... much
pain... " Mulder's face was contorted as it he was feeling
the pain at that very moment. "No.. relief... AHHHHHHHH"
The tortured wailing could be heard throughout the bowels of
the Hoover Building.
Scully phoned Security to have them assure the other
employees that the situation was well under control, even
though she wasn't quite sure it was. Then she returned to
Mulder's side, and squeezed his hand.
Scully couldn't hide her sympathetic suffering from Werber.
He touched her shoulder and motioned for her to relax. But
she would not stray far from Mulder. She was there to
support him. No matter how he suffered.
"Much pain... Sculllyyyyy!!! Where are you?" he cried.
"Need you!"
"Safe Place," Dr. Werber instructed him. "Rest in the safe
place."
Suddenly. Mulder was resting in Scully's arms, at home, in
bed. smiling. Surrounded by the children's pictures and the
sweet smell of baby powder wafting throughout the room.
"If you want to stop now, put one finger up."
No finger was raised.
"I'll let you relax for a moment in the safe place. Gather
strength from it. Dana and I are here to help and support
you. No one may hurt you. Memories are only memories.
Shadows of the past. Rest and replenish your energy."
Werber backed away and allowed the depleted Mulder to rest.
He motioned for Dana Scully to sit in one of the office
chairs and whispered, "I'm surprised and pleased he remembers
as much as he does, Dana."
"Well, he's a strong man in many respects, Doctor. But his
pain is so evident when he dreams. I just feel so incapable of
helping him. So much in common with him, and I know what it's
like."
"Yes, and if you would like further regression as well, I'd be
glad to help take you back. When you make the call. It's all
up to you."
"I'll... I'll need to think about it. I have the children to
think about these days."
"I understand. And, I am very happy for you."
"Thank you. Everything was well worth the effort."
"Fox, do you want to go any further in this session?"
"Nnnn... 'nother time. So tired."
Verber spoke softly to the obviously exhausted Mulder.
"That's quite normal, and we can meet again soon. Now, when
you go to bed tonight, you will have fewer painful dreams,
more restful sleep. Allow yourself to let us help you through
this. As I now count slowly to three, you will open yours
eyes and feel quite relaxed and rested. It's all right to
remember the things you've said here. One... two... three.
There we are."
Mulder opened his eyes. "Scully... "
She ran into his arms as a tear fell down her cheek and
Mulder's eyes were streaming. "Oh, Mulder. Don't speak... I
already know... I do. It's going to get much better."
"I think with a little Dr. Scully therapy, it will," he smiled
through his tears.
Werber headed for the door. "I think I'll leave you two to
talk, okay? Give me a call when you want to go a little
further."
"Dr. Verber?"
"Yes Fox?"
"Thank you. I know I was reluctant at first, but maybe it's
worth getting it all out in the open and really living
again."
"You haven't been, have you?"
"Not as well as I can. Thanks."
"See you soon." Werber left the office as Scully sat on her
husband's knee. "And just what is your recommendation, Dr.
Scully-Mulder?"
"Open your eyes, take it all for what it was, and move on.
That's all anyone can do. I did."
"No regrets?"
"No regrets. And, I think we should have him see you in about
another week. Deal?" She kissed him passionately.
"Never could say no to the enigmatic, sexy, lovely Dr. Scully.
Or the most persuasive Dana Scully-Mulder." As he hugged his
wife tightly, he felt as though he was really coming home for
good: in wakefullness AND sleep.
***
It was eight days after Mulder's first post-abduction
session with Dr. Werber that he and Scully contacted the
regression therapist. They were both anxious to solve Mulder's
lingering trauma due to the time spent on the Shapeshifters'
vessel. Many physical scars had healed long ago, yet there
were concerns over those nightmares Mulder had been having.
The past week had brought Fox Mulder fewer nightmares and less
intense anxiety. The agent was grateful for that. Yet, if he
was not able to fully move on, how could he focus thoroughly
on the joy of his recovered career and beautiful family?
This session took place in Verber's office. Mulder felt he
would be more relaxed there. Also, the chance of being
interrupted by urgent F.B.I. business and phone calls was
reduced. Not by much, granted. But at least no one would pass
him a memo or reach him at his desk phone. Dana Scully Mulder
joined him once more to lend support and love.
"Okay, Fox. Have a seat in the recliner and we'll get started.
How have you felt this past week?"
"Well, not as many nightmares. Right, Scully?."
"They have become less frequesnt and less intense, Dr.
Werber. He seems more at ease with going to sleep. He doesn't
startle as easily in the night."
"I feel more rested, too. Let's get started. Maybe in some
way my therapy will help some of the others."
"Good attitude! I want you now to just let your arms and
legs go loose. Breathe in slowly and deeply, closing yours
eyes and letting your mind drift into a quieter state. Find a
safe place to come back to should you feel the need. Now,
let go of all cares and bodily tension. As I count down from
three to one, I want you to go to the place in the ship where
you left off the lst time I spoke with you. See and feel the
place. Hear the sounds, any words said. Where are you now,
Fox?"
Scully bit her lip as she remembered where her beloved had
left off. A shudder ran through her body and her hands were
cold.
"I'm... I'm in the metal chair. Clamped down. There are
things, drills in my face, my neck, my mouth. They take
tissue samples. They inject me with something... not a drug...
liquid, but not mind-altering. There's this... this... cold
thing. Metal. It goes into ... Sculllyyyyy! I feel her near, but
she can't come to me. It... God, it hurts!!!" His face was
writhing with pain, arms tensed and face reddened. "Need my
safe place. Need her."
"I'm right here, Mulder. I'm not going anywhere. Feel me,
Mulder."
Verber nodded, and Scully held Mulder's hand. It seemed
to loosen up somewhat. "You are in a very safe place, Fox.
Remain there for a few moments, rest, keep your eyes closed.
We will go back, if you wish, in a little while. Just
feel the warmth and serenity of your safe place, your partner
and wife."
Scully continued to hold Mulder's hand and turned to the
doctor. "How is he doing?" She was contemplating ending the
session at that moment.
"He's very strong. And determined. He wants to express his
feelings, tell what happened. But if it does get too intense,
I will insist he stop." Even Werber wasn't quite sure of his
judgment on this.
"He seems more relaxed now. What he must have been through...
I'm so lucky to have him back. She let the tears flow. "He went
through a lot more than I did. I can feel it... "
"I believe you may be right, Dana. But, someday, please, let
me help you with the rest of your abduction experience?
Please... "
"I will. I'm so grateful to you for helping him so far."
"I choose to do this. Okay, Fox. Would you like to go back to
the vessel and recall some more, or leave it until another
time?"
"Want to say more. Need to tell you more."
"You were being tested, and they were injecting you with
something. Do you remember saying that to us?"
"Yes. A liquid. Then... the metal. And samples. Cloned me. He
didn't speak. Sent him to get files, evidence, find the boy...
Gibson. Failed to get the boy. Couldn't stop it. Always held
down. Tests, samples, object in body. Just like the others."
"The others?"
"People like me. To fight for them. Fight the grays. Make more
supersoldiers. Sent me back. Scully thought I was dead.
Scullyyy!"
"I'm here, Mulder and you're alive. You're alive and we had a
baby."
"Trying to help you. Wasn't there... They wanted him. Didn't
do it. William was... helped. He's all right."
"Okay. I'm going to count slowly to three, Fox, and we will be
finished with your regression today. One, slowly coming back to
Dana and me. Two, feeling safe, that it's okay to remember and
not feel badly. Three, open your eyes."
Mulder opened his eyes wide and smiled. "Scully. Always there
for me." Every tension seemed to fade away at that moment.
"Yes. Always. How do you feel?"
"It's so odd, yet so familiar. All the things... probes, tests.
Wanting to see you again. I think I made it because I had you
and the baby to come back to. Just before I left, I could tell
you werecarrying him."
Werber stepped in. The enthusiasm could have been premature
on Mulder's part. The doctor had to be sure. "Are you okay
with the things you remember experiencing?"
"I think so. I guess I can call you if I need any more help."
"Always. And remember, Dana, you can call me anytime to ..."
Of course," she said wirh a smile. "Right now, I just want to
take him home to our family."
"She always says that... "
"Well, there was a time... " Scully gently teased. "I think
you know. I think you know."
Author's Note: This story is actually a Companion Piece to
"When You Call For Me in Your Sleep."
END
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